He tells me that he has six kids, three, oh sorry, four baby mommas of which three are his ex-wives. He goes on and on about how he is a good father and that all his children were born out of love. So I try to be objective but hell thats really hard, I am a single woman with no children, decent job and fairly attractive. Here I am with a fine ass man with six children, four baby mommas and NO JOB. Did I just say NO JOB? Yes I did. This man is "pursuing his dream until he can no longer perform". He is training for the 2008 Olympics in China, I am happy for a brother, having goals and all, but when does reality set in? You have six children, four baby mommas and three of which are ex-wives.
So by the time we arrive at the movie theater I am all spun out, sometimes people should lie! We get to the booth were you pick up the tickets, as I go on to tell him what movie I want to see, which he agreed. He just stands there and fiddles with his wallet, at which time I proceed to pay for my ticket. "Dutch treat, I presume" he says "yes, its safer that way" then his ass goes on to tell the guy in the booth that were on a first date, and after the movie is over we will come out hand in hand. I don't think so, you ask me out, then get me to the movies and tell me its Dutch treat. He has already lost me by this point, I was ready to run screaming through the parking lot like I had the plague, just to get away from this guy. He is a walking No, No. Let me rephrase that ---- He is a walking HELL NO, NO!
At this point I have told myself to make the best of the night and watch the movie, especially since fine ass Jamie Fox (Oscar Winner) was in the movie, and Colin Farrell isn't too bad either. Now remember he couldn't pay for me to watch the movie, but he can order all the food on the menu. Popcorn, m&m's, a burger, cheese fries and a drink and in matter of minutes he has inhaled all of it. What a great date! I can say that I might have hit the bottom of the barrel with this one.
As the evening winds down, and he is walking me back to my car. He asks can he use my phone??? Why??? He goes on to tell me that his phone does not work properly and he has to check his messages from another phone, at this point I just want to get away, far, far away like the Sahara, or maybe Guam even. He checks his messages and decides to put them on speaker phone, since he says "I've got nothing to hide, I don't have anything to loose" yeah like that of a Buyer Beware or a What Not To Do, guide. So he proceeds to listen to his messages two are from his older children and one from his third ex-wife, oh yea did I mention that his third ex-wife is actually his current wife, they never divorced they are separated. After only two years of marriage and one outside child. Oh that's right, the sixth baby is the outside child, the booboo, the mishap, the one that snuck in on you when you were out cheating. Correction he says that he wasn't cheating, "we were having problems". At this point I have started my car and am backing out of my parking space. He tells me" I am so glad we met, I new when I saw you I liked you before I realized you drove a Mercedes." My current separated wife is a Doctor and I signed a pre-nup, so you know I am not in it for the money. Somebody get me a gun!
No comments:
Post a Comment